Wednesday, December 27, 2006

The Saga Continues

Hello. I went to the doctor today cuz my bootay still hurts something fierce...mostly cuz I fell on it again...and my knee still hurts after a month. I called em up and said, "Yo, my nizzles, can ya help a brotha out?" And they said, "Sure. Get here before nooon and we can fit you in. So, I got there at 11am. I understood that it would take a while. I had NO idea. While I'm waiting in the waiting room (bear in mind, I can't sit for very long BECAUSE MY ASS HURTS) this old lady and about 50 of her relatives pile into it, and it's only equipped to handle about 12 people. They're all crying and kissing each other OVER AND OVER AND OVER. At first I thought they were putting to old bag to sleep. My suspicions were confirmed when I left through the waiting room. The family was GONE!!! I'm pretty sure they snuck out the side door while I wasn't looking.

So, anyway, I get there at 11am for the doc to look at my bootay, because it's broken to little bits and it hurts like a mofo. Ya with me? Right-o. At 2:00 I made it to a room, at 2:20, I saw my doctor - now, this lady has been my doctor for 2 1/2 years, but this is the first time I've actually MET her - at 2:25, I was on my way out the door with a referral for an xray and a prescription for some kind of leg doohickey that will keep it from moving, praise Buddah. The only reason the actual appointment took THAT long is because the woman kept rambling ON AND ON AND ON about her soccer team. Nice lady, but I just wanted to go home.

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Sorry about the lapse in the story there. I had to go to the League Meeting for my Derby League. Have you ever?!?!?!?! I mean, Oh my friggin god! (sorry mom) ESTROGEN here, ESTROGEN there! NO WONDER I AM NOT A LESBIAN!! I COULDN'T STAND IT. It was like 20 women all PMSing at the same time. Friggin CRAZY (sorry mom)!!!!
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I asked her where the place to get the knee thing was, and she told me. First I went to get my xrays. Since they needed my insurance card, I drove home to get it and drove back to get my xrays. They made it into a really nice spa-type environment, so when I got my hospital skivies on, I had a nice little chat with the other lady waiting. She asked me what I was having done, and I told her. I asked her what she was in for, and she said she was having an ultrasound. I said, "CONGRATULATIONS!" and started thinking up REALLY cool baby names, like Jessica Junior, and Jessica II, and Jessica the Great. She said, "...because I think I might have a lump in my breast..." and so I put my cigars away=(

Well, then I drove around for an hour trying to find the medical supply store, finally resorting to asking ANYBODY in the area who looked like they had anything to do with anything medical, only to discover that not only was I not on the right street, I was in the wrong part of town. She gave me bum directions, OR she was playing a REALLY funny joke =| ha. ha. I accidentally came across a medical supplier, who did not supply my medical needs, but did have information about a super duper top secret establishment that did. They gave me the phone number and the pass phrase. I called, and they said, "Why, yes, Ms. Swanson, we DO have the item you seek." "NOT TO WORRY," I thought to myself, "It's only 4:45! I can make it to this other fine establishment in time to get my doohickey and go hooooommmmeee!" "We can give you an appointment at 9am tomorrow morning if you like," that nasty biznatch said.

So now I'm home and hungry. I'm going to go get something to eat and walk my dog. I hope you all have a great evening. ttfn;)

1 comment:

mlk_n_cookies said...

well shit. My comment for this blog posted to the other blog. I'm retarded.